Am I a good enough parent? Will my kids be okay?
Of course you wonder! Worries about your child’s future are proof that you care. Now, tell your fear who’s boss. Name out loud all the things you’re already doing to provide, to promote their physical health, and to nurture emotional stability.
Warning: this could take time, but it’s usually helpful in increasing your confidence!
Kids do their best when we believe in them! I trust kids to grow and mature. It’s hard to explain. It’s almost spiritual. But I believe in them so deeply down in my bones that kids can sense it in my presence, my patience and my tone of voice. Demonstrate to your child that you fundamentally believe they are capable.
Brains can adapt! A child’s greatest resource in life is their relationship with a supportive caregiver. Perfection not required. Our brains are wired for adaptability & these are the hallmarks of powerful relationship foundations: forgiveness, repair, and finding our way back to each other after things inevitably go wrong. Kids need to experience adaptability and attunement and reconnection gently in relationships at home before they can grow into independent adults navigating more complex, chosen relationships.
Still nervous? Asking yourself - is that all? Then by all means take some intentional, loving action.
Strengthen your belief in your child by noticing what they’ve already accomplished, even at 2, 3 or 15 years old.
Make casual conversation about your memories of their successes and strong character.
You’ll speak to your fears and your child at the same time. And you’ll set everyone’s sights on a bright, capable future. If this approach or any of these tips are helpful to you, but you need practice or accountability then maybe working with me in counseling could continue to increase your confidence as a parent. Learn more about my services and schedule a free initial phone consultation here.
About the author: Joy Cannon is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Registered Play Therapist and National Certified Counselor providing group, individual and play therapy in her hometown of Austin, Texas. Her specialties include young children ages 3-7 years, caregivers of people with chronic illnesses or mental health diagnoses and intuitive, misunderstood women. She will begin serving as President Elect of the Texas Association for Play Therapy Hill Country Chapter in August 2022.
Disclaimer: The above information is intended to provide a general overview of mental health topics and child development. This information is not a replacement for professional psychotherapy or diagnosis. Seek consultation from a licensed professional for personalized treatment planning.